Tag Archives: listening

sound wave and ear e1643297648156

‘I Must Have Missed It.’

Rhetorical Mastery, , , , , , ,

When you find yourself reminding a friend of what you told them yesterday, you are in the familiar territory of recalling something that mattered more to you than them. 

Occasionally an idea in communication comes along that provokes the realization that it would not be possible to live without it. Good models can help us see what is right in front of us.  So it is with a set of observations that fall under the name of Elaboration-Likelihood Model.  The name might be a little off-putting.  But as a framework for insights about how messages are likely to be received by others, the model is golden.

The work of Richard E. Petty and John Cacioppo, the model proposes that we think about the reception of messages as coming via one of two general pathways.  Messages that are “centrally processed” are, by definition, the kinds that trigger a whole set of critical responses.  These are claims and ideas readers or listeners think about.  Their engagement means that they are more inclined to test these assertions against what they know.  Their beliefs or behaviors have been put in play and may change.

The model assumes that serious attempts at advocacy or involvement must gain a strong foothold in our consciousness. Those that don’t—those messages that get scant attention—are said to be “peripherally processed.”  A message like an advertisement or a casual request from another may wash over us quickly. We are not especially interested or motivated to hang on every word.  And, as you would guess, the message is not likely to produce significant or lasting change.  It has not created an impression that sticks.

                                        Elaboration Likelihood Theory

All of this may seem more or less obvious.  But considering how much a person or audience cares is a worthwhile question. It asks if you can trigger enough attention and interest to have a chance at getting change.  As labels, “Peripheral” and “Central Processing” are good ‘top-of-mind’ concepts.

The model’s relevance increases every year as Americans recede into ever-deeper waters of message overload. We simply weren’t made to attend to what is now a routine exposure to many hundreds of messages every day.  We may deceive ourselves into believing that we can multi-task and accurately consume all that it thrown at us.  We can’t.  Truth to be told, we’re not good multitaskers. Peripheral processing means that we will miss too much to feel bound by a specific request.

Watch a skilled grade school teacher handle a class and you will see a survivor who knows that active listening and central processing are essential and hard won.  It takes time, repeated attempts, a lot of eye contact and follow up. When we get older we are our own bad actors, staring at phones, drifting into other thoughts and ideas, and distracted by internal chatter that will not allow us to focus.

  Another person’s attention is essential.  But it can’t be easily given.

When you find yourself saying to a friend our spouse “I mentioned it yesterday; I’m sure I said it” we are likely recalling something that mattered much more to us than the person who was supposed to be listening.  And, while we can get frustrated at the other’s inattention, we also need to cut them the slack by recognizing that communicating with a peripheral processor is a bit like shouting in the forest.  The people close by may look like they have heard us.  The Elaboration Likelihood model reminds us to have some doubts.

Consider two recommendations.  Repeat what you deem important.  A tactful rewording of the message  that you want to stick may help get the reaction you want.  In addition, give the peripheral-processing “forgetter” some slack.  To attend to every message that comes to us is not possible.  If you tried to do it, you would need a mental health intervention. To be sure, another person’s attention may be expected.  But the the requirements for sanity in an over-communicated society mean that it can’t be easily given.

The Listening Surcharge

Models, , , , ,

fuel-gaugeThe body levels a kind of energy surcharge for focusing on the feelings and ideas of others.

New cars come with instruments that let a driver know how well they are stretching a gallon of gasoline.  Hit the accelerator for repeated jackrabbit starts and the car will let you know you could do better.  Mine has a video display that sends a not-so-subtle message of leaves falling off branches.

We don’t have the same metrics to let us know when we draining our personal energy supplies.  But we know.  Spend an afternoon hiking, cutting wood, cleaning a house  or listening to Uncle Fred’s conspiracy theories and we can immediately recognize the effects of physical or mental exhaustion.

The last instance is a special case.  Straining to capture another’s words is tiring: perhaps less in terms of calories burned than in the mental fatigue that comes with processing and reacting.

For most of us, speaking appears to be the key communication challenge. Who doesn’t blanch at the thought of formally addressing a group?  But accurate and thoughtful listening is often more demanding. The body levels an energy surcharge for being intensely engaged with the feelings and ideas of others.  Following another’s rhetorical wanderings is more taxing than creating our own. Even though the body appears to be inactive, the mind may need to function like a turbocharger responding to an engorgement of air and fuel.

Some jobs are repetitious. We can perform them without becoming cognitively engaged.  But talk to a psychotherapist, a judge, a court reporter, a good customer-relations specialist or a score of individuals in the “people” business, and most will report mental exhaustion at the end of the day.  Hearing others well enough to successfully deal with their problems is an underrated skill. I’m certain the hardest work I do as a professor is–of all things–listening to formal student debates.  In my course in Argumentation I need to hear and assess speeches, rebuttals, counterclaims, and cross-examination questions and answers.  At the end of the debate my notes look like less organized version of a New York City subway map.  Even so, I still miss a lot. Tuning out for even a few seconds allows ideas to escape unheard or underappreciated.

It helps to formally put the task on the day’s agenda of the hard work that lies ahead.

None of us are immune from the fatigue that comes with listening for meaning and nuance.  What helps, however, is the creation of a conscious awareness that an impending listening task will be its own kind of tough work. For this reason it helps to acknowledge listening challenges to be faced before they start. Just as you might “psych” yourself help for a presentation to a group of people, it is helpful to mentally process the fact that the next minutes or hours will require some prodigious listening. This puts the task on the day’s agenda of the challenging work to be completed.  Think of how often you pass on specific and important information to others who show no sign that they see the moment as significant.  Note taking, or asking for clarification would be what most information-givers would like to see.  What we usually get instead is an individual cognitively ‘idling’ while giving the appearance of being tuned in.

It would be nice to report that mental effort burns calories.  But that’s not really the case.  Mental exertion does seem to burn glucose, but that’s no pathway to weight control.  And there’s the rub. The energy we expend in active listening produces mental fatigue, but not a physical “burn,” giving most of it’s benefits to the person who was given the gift of being heard accurately.